“I am troubled, I am bowed down greatly; I go mourning all the day long.” Psalm 38:6
Father, the Almighty, I come before You by Your grace to love You, worship You, lift Your name on high and to declare Your praises! Thank You, Father, for the blessings we have received in the ministry in Rwanda. O bring much true grace to Your people there; reform their churches, renew them personally and corporately and revive them, Lord. Thank You that Kappy is well in Your care, protection and loving grace. O God, my Father, I mourn for my sin and like David, Your servant, I am troubled and bowed down in my heart. As I remember the days of Your judgment and my wickedness-the days of heart-break and despair when I was mad in my unbelief, sinfulness and unregeneracy I mourn for my sin. I remember being bowed down physically as though a boulder had been placed upon my shoulders. I remember my fear, loathing, terror and hopelessness. But I remember, too, that in Your time and perfect plan You lifted this crushing boulder of guilt, sin, death, misery and condemnation off of me!
I still mourn for my sin, Father, by Your grace, and in my heart of hearts I weep in grief for the sin that I now commit and always for the sins that I committed before Your grace and that I can never forget. I weep for my fallenness-that evil which remains in me and my sin of sin-that I continue to transgress Your law of love. I am blessed to mourn for my sinfulness, Father, for You have graciously shown it to me. I praise you, my Father, for I am not troubled in a state of lostness as before but now I am troubled in saving grace and hope! I am not without God now and I rejoice in my mournings for sin and that which You hate, I too, have come to hate. That which You love I have come to love.
Thank You for Your grace, for Your love, for Your patience, for Your strength and power, for Your nearness. O give us wisdom and peace as we grieve for our sin and for the sins of others, Father. You alone are the worthy and true God! Your name is wonderful! And all of Your ways are gracious and excellent as You are worthy and excellent. You give to us daily help, deliverance and blessing. O teach us, our God, to live ever more fully in Your presence and to have fellowship and share in closeness to You. To know You is the blessing of our existence and being. And to know You more is an excellent glory. In Jesus name, amen.